MC Hammer is turning in his Hammer pants for MMA trunks.  The former rap star is starting an MMA business and has already signed a few high profile names such as Nate Marquardt, Tim Kennedy, Vladimir Matyushenko and  Jorge Rivera.  We are going to have much more on this story next week, when our own Kalin Johnston interviews MC Hammer.  But for now, it's time to dream. What if Lyoto Machida joins the Hammer Time team?  Here's an artist's conception:

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You may find yourself helplessly enraptured by the beguiling caricature of Takanori Gomi depicted above.  You are not alone.  A fan on The Underground Forum whittled this masterpiece out a few years ago, and the painfully atrocious rendering inspired a legion of loyal followers; some pleading for him to never even so much as consider drawing ever again, others clamoring for more production to ensure the widespread laughter and joy that so thoroughly accompanied the first.

There's a rumor floating around that the unfortunate artist is now a famous MMA journalist.  The point, however, is that Pride legend Takanori Gomi partakes in part two of his UFC career on Sunday night's "UFC on Versus 2" show, and risks being released should his performance be as disappointing as his first entry versus Kenny Florian.  The reality that this could potentially be Gomi's last premiere MMA fight justified exposing the world to the lore of "Gomi Head".  Therefore, since I am God of only this small white box within the clutches of the internet, Takanori Gomi and his pairing with Tyson Griffin usurps the main event for this installment.

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They don't call Wanderlei Silva the Axe Murderer for nothing.  He's one of the most ferocious fighters in the history of the sport, and his kill or be killed style has been thrilling fans for well over a decade.  His path of destruction is legendary:  his Muay Thai plum has squashed countless opponents like grapes, and there are several severed heads in low earth orbit courtesy of his knees and soccer kicks.

But behind the MMA monster is a man.  A mortal human being who feels pain and expresses emotion.  In this poignant video blog from the hospital where he's having knee surgery, Wanderlei blogs about his future in the UFC, at one point even choking up a little.  If that doesn't move you, you must look like Butterbean or Manny Yarborough, if you catch my drift.  Here's the vid.

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Come on, we've all been there before.  You're dialing in your bike, "two big ass Fedor's" drive by and honk, you retort, an all-out brawl ensues, you slip in your biking shoes, they stab you with a pen, you heel-hook one and eventually scare them off to resume with your pleasant bike ride.

No?  What a sheltered and unadventurous life you must lead.  After the jump, take a walk in the bicycle shoes of Stockton's finest scrapper, Nick Diaz, who relates the tale while further justifying why he "ain't no bitch".

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August will be a very busy month for MMA.  Three big UFC events will take place, including UFC 117, which features Anderson Silva defending his middleweight championship against Chael Sonnen.  Later this month we will see UFC 118, which will feature the heavily anticipated rematch between B.J. Penn and Frankie Edgar for the lightweight title.

First things first though.  We will kick things off on Sunday, August 1^st with "UFC on Versus 2".  This one comes to us live from San Diego and will be headlined by Jon Jones squaring off against Vladimir Matyushenko.  We also get to welcome legendary MMA referee “Big” John McCarthy back to the UFC Octagon for the first time in years!  This card will be an exciting one to watch for many reasons.   Let’s break down the main card, shall we?

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Here's a sneak peek from The Voice, aka Michaek Schiavello, talking with Jason "Mayhem" Miller about which fighter Mayhem hates the most, the infamous Nick Diaz.  The Voice will also be taking an inside look at the Strikeforce brawl.

Show premieres tonight Friday July 30 at 10pm ET, 930pm PT on HDNET.  Be sure to tune in!

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The war of words between Chael Sonnen and Anderson Silva has been more like a massacre than a war.  Sonnen seems to have an endless arsenal of insults and barbs to throw at Anderson, who has remain stoic throughout the bombardment.  It will be very interesting to see how Anderson performs in the Octagon after taking a shellacking from Chael on paper.  Will he stick with his counterpunching style or will he go right after Sonnen to pay him back for the verbal barrage?  We'll find out in two days.

In the meantime, check out this preview video.

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